I have to wonder why HILLARY Clinton wants to be President after she was first-hand witness to the absolute hell the GOP put her husband trhough for 8 years. To me, it made little sense. Then it occured to me....one word....revenge.
First, against her own husband. I'll bet Hillary plans to wrap her legs around every hot young intern she can find. And she doesn't have to worry about some psycho saving a dress with Presidental "memories". (No it wasn't a plant...yeah...right.)
Second, against every Republican politico who every bad mouthed her...demise of the line-item veto not withstanding. I suspect we'll see photos of Larry Craig dressed up like Madonna shortly after her inauguration if she wins.
Third, against the American people (especially those Obama supporters) as she starts to ignore nearly every promise made during the campaign, just like Bill did (Thanks for that whole DOMA thing Bill).
Now if we agree with George Carlin that international politics is really all about 'who has the bigger dick' than clearly we are at a disadvantage with Hillary. Now Obama, on the otherhand...I hate to be steriotypical but from my experience some steriotypes are based in fact.
Don't get me wrong, I think she's better than John McCain who spoke of Lincoln the other day by telling a group of seniors that he knew Abe well. He's certainly old enough for that to be believable. I heard he might have to have facial surgery again...they want to try to make him look younger...like about 100. I finally figured out why McCain is having photo op after photo op with seniors and WWII military vets...the only way they can make him look young is to picture him with people older than him. Unfortunately we are losing WWII vets rapidly so McCain has to take every opportunity to get those pictures quickly.
I saw a picture of him at a natural history museum and I wasn't sure which object in the picture was McCain and which was the dinosaur (which never existed because they're not in the Bible right?).
And for those you you about to jump on my case, I invite you to check out the category this article is published under. It's SATIRE. Ahhh politics...
You hit the nail on the head. We knew why Edwards wanted to be President. We know why Obama wants to be President. Hell, we even know why McCain wants to be President(Four more years of Bush!!!). But why does Hillary? We've never heard it. And of course she won't say revenge publicly.
Posted by: Ghost of Tom Joad | March 09, 2008 at 01:02 PM
-Kirk WentzelPosted by: Thomas Taylor | March 09, 2008 at 08:45 PM
Why are you signing things with my name? I don't get it.
It may because it's early in the morning or that is just too much of a non sequitur? It's possible your trying to quote me...in which case we use things called quote marks dear....they look like this: "
Posted by: Kirk Wentzel | March 10, 2008 at 06:37 AM
"And she doesn't have to worry about some psycho saving a dress with Presidental "memories". (No it wasn't a plant...yeah...right.)"
So, Monica was a plant...a cog in the vast right wing conspiracy machine? Or was she simply a chubby intern that a certain former President with a history of philandering put the moves on after she flashed him her oversized thong? And calling her a psycho is right out of Sid Vicious Blumenthal/James Carville playbook in blaming the victim mentality. They were ready to tar and feather that girl UNTIL she came (no pun intented) back with the dress as proof.
Or am I missing that clever satire?
Posted by: tyler | March 10, 2008 at 09:50 AM
Tyler, come on. I may be gay but I don't know a single girl...not ONE, that would not have shreiked in horror and RAN the dress to the dry cleaner to remove that specific kind of "memory". She preserved it like evidence from a crime scene.
Forgive me if I'm a little skeptical about that particular odd sequence of events. Neither of them were angels but the existance of that dress complete with stain seemed just a bit TOO convenient so I have to admit it makes me wonder a little, yeah.
VAST conspiracy...I didn't say that...why is it assumed we think it was a vast conspiracy, it could have been a very small operation without the knowledge of the leadership.
John and I could reveal damaging things we know about some local Democrats without the leadership of the local GOP knowing about it but the GOP would certainly take advantage of it if I did. They would be stupid not to. So I don't dismiss anything.
Posted by: Kirk Wentzel | March 10, 2008 at 10:36 AM
I know John likes baseball...so I will use a recent baseball analogy plucked from todays headlines...
Why did Brian McNamee keep needles and gauze pads from injections dated back in 2000 and 2001 for Roger Clemens? Maybe in the back of his mind, he knew the true nature and much like Monica, he thought he was going to be tossed under the proverbial bus so he needed something 'just in case'.
Kinda makes the 'they are lying' ring hollow.
Bill: I did not have sexual relations with woman...What? She kept the dress? Ah crap...ok, yea, i did diddle with the fat girl...
As for the conspiracy charge...the question needs to be asked...WHO got Monica in as an intern...if memory serves...her dad was a big time dem donor...or was it Richard Mellon Scaife who got her the job?
If we can figure out who placed her there...then you have a good starting point as to who is behind the attempt to bring down a presidency.
VastRWConspirator1: So if I get this straight, all we have to do to bring down Clinton is get him into arms reach of a chubby girl? That's it?
VastRWConspirator2: Yup. All she has to do it flash her thong...the rest falls into place.
1: You gotta be kidding me...one chubby girl wearing a thong???
2: I know it sounds crazy, but it'll work.
1: Ok, who do we know?
2: I know this big time doctor who is a democratic donor...his daughter might fit the bill (no pun intended)...
have a great day :)
Posted by: tyler | March 10, 2008 at 02:47 PM
I know John likes baseball...so I will use a recent baseball analogy plucked from todays headlines...
Why did Brian McNamee keep needles and gauze pads from injections dated back in 2000 and 2001 for Roger Clemens? Maybe in the back of his mind, he knew the true nature and much like Monica, he thought he was going to be tossed under the proverbial bus so he needed something 'just in case'.
Kinda makes the 'they are lying' ring hollow.
Bill: I did not have sexual relations with woman...What? She kept the dress? Ah crap...ok, yea, i did diddle with the fat girl...
As for the conspiracy charge...the question needs to be asked...WHO got Monica in as an intern...if memory serves...her dad was a big time dem donor...or was it Richard Mellon Scaife who got her the job?
If we can figure out who placed her there...then you have a good starting point as to who is behind the attempt to bring down a presidency.
VastRWConspirator1: So if I get this straight, all we have to do to bring down Clinton is get him into arms reach of a chubby girl? That's it?
VastRWConspirator2: Yup. All she has to do it flash her thong...the rest falls into place.
1: You gotta be kidding me...one chubby girl wearing a thong???
2: I know it sounds crazy, but it'll work.
1: Ok, who do we know?
2: I know this big time doctor who is a democratic donor...his daughter might fit the bill (no pun intended)...
have a great day :)
Posted by: tyler | March 10, 2008 at 02:48 PM
I know John likes baseball...so I will use a recent baseball analogy plucked from todays headlines...
Why did Brian McNamee keep needles and gauze pads from injections dated back in 2000 and 2001 for Roger Clemens? Maybe in the back of his mind, he knew the true nature and much like Monica, he thought he was going to be tossed under the proverbial bus so he needed something 'just in case'.
Kinda makes the 'they are lying' ring hollow.
Bill: I did not have sexual relations with woman...What? She kept the dress? Ah crap...ok, yea, i did diddle with the fat girl...
As for the conspiracy charge...the question needs to be asked...WHO got Monica in as an intern...if memory serves...her dad was a big time dem donor...or was it Richard Mellon Scaife who got her the job?
If we can figure out who placed her there...then you have a good starting point as to who is behind the attempt to bring down a presidency.
VastRWConspirator1: So if I get this straight, all we have to do to bring down Clinton is get him into arms reach of a chubby girl? That's it?
VastRWConspirator2: Yup. All she has to do it flash her thong...the rest falls into place.
1: You gotta be kidding me...one chubby girl wearing a thong???
2: I know it sounds crazy, but it'll work.
1: Ok, who do we know?
2: I know this big time doctor who is a democratic donor...his daughter might fit the bill (no pun intended)...
have a great day :)
Posted by: tyler | March 10, 2008 at 02:49 PM
my bad...kept getting errors when trying to post...didnt mean to post 3 times.
Posted by: tyler | March 10, 2008 at 02:57 PM
"...didnt mean to post 3 times"
Oh sure you didn't. Conspirators always proclaim their innocence. LOL :)
Posted by: Melissa | March 10, 2008 at 03:59 PM
I'm not saying Bill didn't lie about it...clearly he tried to wiggle out of it. BTW is it just fat girls in thongs that straight guys like? I mean what's the most important component, the girl part or the thong part cause I'm not above buying John a thong if it will help. (I'm in deep shit now.)
But really a MAN keeping needles and a WOMAN keeping a spooged dress are slightly different. Logically, don't you think it's natural to think she (and he) would NOT have wanted all that to come out. Having evidence in your closet kind of goes against that. If you are trying to keep something secret you generally GET RID of evidence, you don't preserve it.
I admit I don't know all the facts of that case but I was always wondered why did she keep the dress if she didn't want this to become public. One POSSIBLE answer to that question is that perhaps she did want to become public. It makes me wonder. Keeping it secret + keeping evidence = something that doesn't quite add up.
Posted by: Kirk Wentzel | March 10, 2008 at 05:13 PM
Looking at it and trying to be objective...I dont think Bill has a 'type'. He's pulled some babes (elizabeth gracen was in playboy)and he's gone after some dogs (pre surgery paula jones). I guess what he was attracted to was a pulse. Well, actually, THAT isnt accurate if you remember his comments about the Peruvian mummy he said he would date. (Google it if you think I am making that last part up.)
I just think the man was/is addicted.
But again, going back to the root of this thread...unless you can prove some member of the VRWC put Monica in the internship position for the purpose of causing an affair with the President, then the claims of her being a plant are allegations at best by folks who want to blame everyone BUT the guy whose own misdeeds brought on his own troubles. The buck stops at President Clinton's desk.
:)
Posted by: tyler | March 11, 2008 at 11:54 AM