I was conversing with a friend and fellow politico last Thursday about the presidential race and he posed an interesting scenario: what if the three choices for president are Barack Obama, Mitt Romney and Michael Bloomberg? A Black, a Mormon and a Jew. The rednecks, bigots, and Klansmen would go crazy! This would be the equivalent of redneck hell wouldn't it? We surmised that they'd be jumping off bridges due to their despair.
Therefore the thought occurred to me we could take advantage of such an opportunity and make money for our cause at the same time. If there's to be mass redneck suicide why not use that new bridge a Native American tribe just built at the Grand Canyon? We could run bus tours for the rednecks (call it the 'Jonestown Express') and serve each one a glass of Kool Aid before they jump. The tribe collects a fee from each bigot to use their walkway and we all fund our progressive programs. We also get rid of a sizable number of rednecks.
Keep this up and you're going to outdo Anne Coulter for the most radical writer on the net.
Posted by: Buck Batard | July 09, 2007 at 02:05 PM
There's one big difference: mine is clearly marked as satire. It's humor. Hers is serious.
Posted by: John Morgan | July 09, 2007 at 02:17 PM
I think Anne would be the first in line. Can we add women and an alternative lifestyler to that presidential lineup. That might do it.
Posted by: dl | July 09, 2007 at 05:27 PM
Buck Retard has this bad habit of not checking how articles are classified. I also write humor and satire here. Heck, we can't be serious all the time or we'll go crazy with madmen running the country.
As I recall comedians do redneck jokes all the time. That's all this is.
Can you imagine Ann Coulter with this presidential lineup? She'll be an automatic quote machine. She'll keep me in material for months.
Posted by: John Morgan | July 09, 2007 at 05:43 PM
Last week Mann was back on her "women shouldn't vote" kick....which begs the question: why would a woman ask someone to revoke her rights?
Unless, of course, that jumbo adam's apple is indicative of what some of us suspect about "her"....
Posted by: Melissa | July 09, 2007 at 07:19 PM
Remind me again why Ms. Coulter has an adam's apple???
Posted by: John Morgan | July 09, 2007 at 10:57 PM
Ummmm....tomorrow during recess we could always discuss how batteries have + ends and - ends, John. :)
Posted by: Melissa | July 10, 2007 at 08:35 AM
Relax, John. I'm certain Buck had his tongue in his cheek for that comment!
Posted by: Joyful Alternative | July 10, 2007 at 08:58 AM